It wasn't and I ended up injuring my shins. The injury and the memory have stayed with me until now.
I felt guilty that I did not do the right thing and put myself and my sister at risk. Ever since I have felt vaguely guilty about many things. If my kids got sick, somehow I did not keep them healthy enough. If my clients did not get better then I could have done more. If the dog was hurt than somehow I should have known better.
It is a feeling of overwhelming guilt that I have been repeating quietly to myself for many years.
Then I began wondering how many other people do this as well. I have a strong feeling that most of us do and never talk about it.