Finally, I am stopping this cycle and actually getting the appropriate help that I need. Truthfully, I am nervous each time that I go for a training but I still go. It has been a month so far and this is a big accomplishment for me. At my last session, my trainer told me a story about one his clients who refused to do more than three reps of any exercise. After nine months of doing this, the client explained that he was afraid to feel the" burn".
I can definitely understand this. I, too, get scared that I may be hurting myself and pushing too far. With a trained professional, I do feel much safer. I also feel that this is applicable to doing emotional healing. When we always do the healing on our own, we may get scared and make frequent starts and stops. With a trusted healer , it feels safer to go for the" burn" and do the deeper healing.